gotta pick up luggage today at the millers, the macdonalds, and the herberts.
gotta buy last minute things for cambodiee.
gotta charge my camera.
gotta go to the pool.

got a lot to do and I woke up at 12... with NO sniffels! :]

D

p.s. transformers was naughty, however, I am in love with bumblebee and Shia, soo.. i loved transformers. :]

i recommend you DO see it with a boy and cover his eyes during naughty parts. oh megan fox.

want a hat?

last night.

i cleaned out my car.. then vacuumed it.
i picked up hannah grace and her stuff, saying hello to sweet mrs. Ray and those mickyDs.
we went on to camp to eat snack shack with people and visit :]
i miss courtney, david. andrew, shelley, aaron, nathaniel, katie, julia, patish, faithin, all those people.
then we went with chris hughes, david levin, jordan lassiter, susan jennings, and bec to krispey kreme. and it was delish and fantastically fun.
next we went back to camp and had an adventure...

handing out hats at green lights to cars, loud music, no wind cause rebecca didnt want any :p, catching balls in our krispey kreme hats, hiking halfway to dwights house, shelley and ashley encounter, doughnut delivering! happy counselors, golf cart tipping, dark path, chilling at the levins, and so much more.

came home and talked with gracie for hours.

good night last night :] now lets see... friday...

D

not and yet so significant.

LESSON #1

today the "lesson" I learned at camp was finally put to the test.

It has become so apparent and so confusing to me how its so hard to show the deep, compassionate, fruitful love that we are supposed to have to your very best friends or your family a lot of the time. It's mind boggling how we "love" them so much, yet a lot of the time if a stranger saw us on a "bad day" they would think we hate the ones closest to us. I love God, I want to show him by honoring what He says and what He tells me to do. He tells me to love. "Okay God, I'll love, I'll bake cookies for people.... I'll smile more.. but wait... you want... whole hearted love? you want... joy and peace and patience? that kind of love? well that friend... isn't being nice to me.. why should I be nice to them.. maybe some other time."

"maybe. some. other. time"

I wonder how many times I have said that to God for this specific thing. loving my dearest friends and family. hmm. toooo many times is the right answer.

God didnt call us to love those who love you. God called us to love everyone. We love because He first loved us. I love because God told me to, not because anyone earned it... if we had to earn love.. shoot.. I wouldnt get as much as I do now!

LESSON #2

God told me to read Colossians. I started and realized I am now breaking down every little thing like my youth pastor... I LOVE IT. I have to go back and read the same thing millions of times to even try and understand.. its so fun :] but... I realized that reading a whole book in one night isnt a good idea always. I had to stop when I got to the second chapter and just stick with chapter one for the night... and not even all of it at that. I have been praying for a devotion, a bible study, a book. I got a new devotion a couple of weeks ago, however I've been at camp doing those devotions.. so it's been difficult to switch. I've been praying for almost a year just.. for a book to be revealed to me and it was. IT WASSSSS. tonight :] so I am now deeply studying Colossians.. and I am excited.

I will point out something that hit me at the very beginning of this book.

Paul writes at the very beginning of his letter, "Paul, an apostle of Christ Jesus by the will of God..." STOP.

Paul says by the will of God he is an apostle of Christ Jesus. He doesnt just say what he is, he completley gives the credit to God right off the bat. That's amazing to me.. and I don't know why. It's so humbling. You can see Paul literally on his face saying, "praise be to God that I am here to serve Him. It was His will that I serve him, write these letters, preach His good name, worship the Father and God saw to it that His will be done. It is by the will of God that I am here to serve you." If you remember.... Paul wasn't always Paul... back when he was Saul, he persecuted christians and it's amazing to me the complete 180 direction God took him in. After God entered that man's heart, he realized there was no credit that Paul himself was worthy enough to receive... it all belonged to God.

anyways, thats just the beginning verse... half of it haha... see what I mean? :]

tomorrow:

I take Dave, Court, Andrew, Shelley and Matt some snackers.

I learn how to babysit a dog.. with Rach :]

I go to snack shack and spend the night at a strangers house with G.. PINK PANTHA TIMEEE :p

and... I rest.. I have to be 100% or I can't go to Cambodia :/

Prayer requests:

Andrew Miller is really sick... he can't hear :/ Please pray for his healing.

I am still sick and like I said.. I have to be 100%

Camp staff = strength, health and sleep.

Cambodia team = teamwork, saftey, peace, wisdom, health, money.

My youth pastor and his family are going on a potentially stressful trip = saftey, peace, wisdom in what to say and when to say it, understanding hearts and minds.

and... there are a lot of idiot bugs crawling in my room.. its redonkulous. seriously.

D

mm mm good.

i have some good people looking out for me.

Thanks Emily, thanks Katie :]

the thought that burns into my brain.

i dont know. do i want to go?

why didnt i just be on staff?

why didnt i just save a lot of money?

why didnt i just go to all my youth groups and not miss any for meetings?

why cant i figure out what God wants?

toms, fever of 105, and cambodia lists.

I have been going over notes from camp and it was actually quite glorious. I think Friday night was the night that I was so sure about... It was still a weird week but most of my very good friends were there and I honestly did love every minute of it.

Friday night though I slept horribly and woke up with a fever of 105... which is very high... apparently my body reacted to the typhoid pills I had been taking for Cambodia in a very negative way.... I had that fever, a cough, a very bad headache, and muscle pains most of Saturday and most of today... however with some advil my fever has dropped to 101 :] praise Jesus! never thought I would be excited about a fever of 101 :p I have just been laying in my bed but thank the Lord for laptops :p it has atleast kept me entertained until I fall asleep every few hours.

Also while I have been up, I have been making packing lists for Cambodia... I never seen such a long packing list and yet we can only take a 50 llb. bag, a 15 llb. carry on and a big purse... and this is the girl who packs 1902412 suitcases for two days! I did order some Lands End water tennies and some TOMS though and that excites me to no end!

I also found another pair that I like but I needed one that went with everything I was bringing and these are the pair that I chose :] I was impressed with the story behind TOMS.. its amazing what ideas God can bring to peoples heads. These amazingly comfortable shoes are perfect for any weather and any climate and when you buy a pair, you automatically buy a pair for a child in need. I give full credit to JULIA SASSER for showing me these awesome shoes!

I am praying that after this stupid sickness is over I remember everything that I need... I leave in 8 days :/ I also pray for everyone here... those at camp, those with family, those with friends... I pray that whether in Cambodia or serving those around you that they and we are making a difference. That's why we are here.

D

catch a falling star and put it in your pocket.

i cant wait to post the things i learned this week on here.

but i will say this week was odd. all of my friends mostly were there, that was fantastic. it just felt.... normal though... like... christmas.... now... all the hype and excitment is and was gone.. but I learned important things that will and have changed my life.

i dont know how to handle myself. I need the Lord to just duct tape my mouth and then move me where he wants me!!! geeze.

tomorrow:
i am entertainer for cousins at the pool all day.
i must write my testimony for Cambodia.
i must write out lists of everything that needs to be bought, packed, or arranged before my 10 days are up.
i must sleep.

D

checklistin it.

so many things to accomplish and complete before Sunday afternoon:

• must memorize lines and songs and have them down. badly.
• must work on cambodia skit. cast the whole thing.
• must wash camp clothes, steam recital costumes, and organize dance things.
• must babysit evelyn-grace gabrielle munroe. a lot.
• must prepare prayer requests to be said on Sunday morning.
• must outline what I am going to speak about in Cambodia. (practice song with nuke and becs)
• must buy new rainbows.

prayerrrrr needed!!!

these weeks. they go by TOO FASTTTT!

on a more relaxed note.. I feel very happy and floaty... I never thought this feeling would come really... I thought it would be like a movie and I would just want it to come.. but.. it came.. it might... be here..hmm. Praise the Lord for his peace.

my face is breaking out. happy, floaty nonesense does that ya know.

teen week next week. cambodia in two weeks for two weeks, beach week, day camp weeks, school? oh well.. atleast im a senior :p

some pics for my last post :]

i have a trillion. if you want to see them all:: facebook.

i am late for my cambodia meeting because my mom is at the store.

this week I am doing several things; not necessarily all things I want to be doing... but things none the less.

Monday: dance pictures:: I do like putting on stage makeup :]

Tuesday: dance recital dress rehersal:: always stressful but fun

Wednesday: hm

Thursday: more hm

Friday: dundundundunnnnn:: my play

each day will consist of the pool and memorizing Charlie Brown lines, also this week I will have Cambodia lists complete, David's birthday present complete, cookies brought to orientation week and my room will be cleaned.

I am going to youth group tonight! even though my head hurts so bad I can barely even see.... oh well, I miss my youth group.


I miss camp and unclogged heads.
D


[more thoughts]
you know when you look around after having the funnest time and then you see the ones who are closest to you and they look sad.. or frustrated and you dont know what to do because you just want to be happy but they arent and when you ask them whats wrong they say, "nothing, I am fine,"... and all you want is for them to be happy but they wont let you help and its just really annoying... yes... well.. thats how I feel about five of my very closest friends. five. five of them.

and it has dampered me and on top of the whole thing I have a headache. a very bad one. and I want to go back to camp but it makes me feel a little better to know that God still has a plan for me.

now I will also add a tad little reminder: I did have the best week ever. Like, ever.

not even accurate.

this post cannot be considered completely accurate. at all because I dont have time to describe everything and every emotion because I am so tired that I might cry.

Last weekend [so good]: shopping, packing, random concert downtown(?), krispey kreme (!), first day wearing a staff shirt ever, realization of best cabin in the world.

This week [even better]: black cats, laughter (a lot), this is so much fun, hitting game, soft pb&js, bible class with annie, cocos with becksta, honor cabin (woootwoot!), i was on staff, SKIT NIGHT, Nathaniel's video, friends are backk, go cars :p, mudding in go cars, yucky lake, creative movement, SNACK SHACK (was fun), first poem of the day (!), encouragement notes, journal entries written in Stephen's handwriting, pictures, games, the ribbons, mr. dave, porch nights! infirmary, Andrew's gross ear, slusherss (wishy washy?!), gazebo, black markered feet, ultimate, tether ball champs, silly campers, races, david levin treats! david choquette visits! david blanchard drop offs! the lambs, early week 2009.

so much more. so so much more. such a good week.

I'm sad... I want to be here all summer... not Cambodia... oh Lord, be my strength... I think I am going where I was called... so reassure me. I am going to MISS all of it... a lot...

now I'm a.. camper.

weekend [uhm. okay]... dundundun.... not as good.

:: yucky charlie brown practice, yucky mime without rach, meeting at the carlsons was pretty good but... alas... anna.... caleb..... john... and david....

ugh. and i was doing so well. life was going smoothly for at least one week... just couldn't obtain that finish i guess.

LORD BE WITH ME!

D