I have been so stinkin BUSY! I knew that would happen as soon as I graduated and summer started.. but SHEESH. Rules video shooting was cancelled today on account of "rain" so... shopping for camp things! When I was younger I would make probably literally hundreds of lists... I still sorta do.. but I specifically made camp PACKING lists... I would write it and re-write it over and over. AND NOW I am making lists for college and being a counselor.. this is all toooo crazy.
Things I must by:
-toothpaste, shampoo, conditioner, deodorant, face wash
-new toms (see top!)
-new socks, tennis shoes
-four new pairs of shorts
Things I must do:
-clean my room
-wash ALL laundry
p.s. I agree with Courtney... if Kurt and Finn start dating.. I'll be a little mad at Glee.
camp starts next week, John has arrived, Gordon's left, Chris leaves tomorrow, I graduate Saturday, party Sunday... I have so, so much to do... it is time for me to get a list together for today so I can CONCENTRATE!
people have always said, "sometimes God calls you to things you don't want to do." and you nod and agree because even if He hasn't called you out of your comfort zone.. you "know" God would do "something like that."
you know.. God did it. He called me to do something I not only didnt want to do.. I refused to even think of it as a possibility. He called me to Regent... if I had the time or I thought you really cared, I would spend the time to explain the long process and turmoil God allowed me to go through before I finally made the decision to obey His calling.. if you really want to know the story.. take me aside sometime and just ask me! I would love more than anything to share this lesson with you....
you know.. this year God has just swooped me under billions of lessons my stubborn heart NEEDED to learn... but this senior year has changed my life. I learned three huge lessons that I could never have learned without the mercy of my ever loving Father and the patient hearts of the friends and family God has blessed me with.
1. perseverance (good story)
2. forgiveness (good story)
3. trust / obedience (not ended.. so far so good)
all three (four) of these things are things that you can't succeed without. If you just "give up" and don't continually seek God in everything that you do ("whether you eat or drink" HOW SIMPLE?!) then you will miss out on the most amazing thing God has for you.. YOUR LIFE. If you don't learn how to forgive people like the Father forgave you.. you are in for a dark run and nothing will go well for you. We need to realize that not forgiving someone doesn't harm that other person ONE BIT, it just rips apart YOUR insides. If you don't learn to trust the Almighty God who is omnipotent then pridefully you are putting your "ideas" and "decisions" before the one who created your very being... that doesn't really.. make sense..
however.. these lessons aren't easy and even if I went through some very, very tough things to even start to realize the depth of these lessons... it is still a daily decision I have to make and struggle doing so without the help of my father. But I thank the Lord for the great opportunity to go through the trials to start to realize how much those things are actually applicable and needed in everyones life.. much less my own.
I am going to miss them.. I really am.. but I know that you don't lose family when you go to college... and they are nothing less than family.
sometimes I am confused at what in world God is THINKING?! and by sometimes, I mean majority of the time. I sometimes feel like I just am so confused that I look to the sky and I can see God with His hands on His hips giving me some sort of evie expression saying,"Daryllllll.. what the heck are you doing!?" and I'm like, "I DON'T KNOW!"
Trust is defined as several things (it's frustrating when you look up a word and it has 21094 billion definitions.)
My favorite is:confidentexpectationofsomething;hope.
I have hope in the Lord. I know this... but then it boils down to.. do I know it? do I believe it? do I believe God has my life in in His hands and He knows what He is doing just as much as I trust my cereal to taste like cereal or my hands to type when I touch this keyboard?
God knows. He knows that I SAY that I trust Him... and I do believe He is giving me PLENTY of opportunities to prove my trust and belief. If everything works out the way it looks like it is going to.. then I will be attending Regent University next fall. If I am horribly uncomfortable, I will transfer to Liberty. However, I feel the Lord tugging on my heart and if I am truly called to Regent... uncomfortable might be the feeling God wants me to have. My whole life goal is to be "uncomfortable"... and I suppose God is going with, "there is no time like the present!"
He did bless me however with a summer filled with family and friends. I will be around my true families for two more months and then I will have to say goodbye... but as my good friend, Regina Spektor, puts it,
"I'll come back when you call me, no need to say goodbye."
and that is certainly the truth! One call from any family member (that DEFINITELY includes any miller, levin, carlson, macdonald, price, clements, brown, vanover, ray, williams, drummond, walker, or munroe) and I will be back in a jiff jiffy! I love them each dearly, and I couldn't be more thankful for the families I will grow old with. I do believe I can lose friends when I go to college, but I know I can't lose family.
Thanks dear Lord for your strength!
p.s. people. I have some things left before its all funny fun summer!
I decided a little update was in order since a few things have happened recently.
This weekend I went on the amazing beach trip with my amazing youth group! We stayed in an amazing beach house (uhMAZEing.) But best of all, I spent a lot of time with God. We were told to think of the thing we really need God to provide... and mine was PEACE. I really needed God's peace on this whole college decision because right now, it doesn't look either fun or what I originally wanted.. but sometimes you just have to trust God and know He will provide. My beautiful girls surrounded me and prayed God's peace over me, and the power of prayer is phenomenal. I know HE will provide for all my needs, and I know that He will honor me admitting my fear to this group of believers.
I also got sun poisoning. I was very, very sick. VERY. But it's over now.... but still not worth it! GO sunscreen! (a little)
Tuesday was the long awaited Storm Banquet! It was fantastic. I don't want to talk about how it is the end now.. and how it is all over.. but I do want to remember this story from my life. Storm changed my life and my every high school year. The lessons God taught me through that team will last forever in the heart of this servant. It did make me excited for camp though which starts in.... FOUR WEEKS!
oh oh! also! Stephie is making a video blog.. and I am so darn excited... for reasons I cant really mention on here :) but I left a somewhat clue!
The Lord Jesus Christ is my everything. I have a desire to let everyone know about him and have the oppertunity to grow close in his loving arms. I believe that he gave me certain talents to use in reaching the lost and I can't wait to see how God uses me in his already written story.